About a third of the way through my to do list for the day I realized that there is no way I will get it done in a day. Now, I like for my plans to pan out. I put a lot of effort into reaching my goals and when I set unlikely, probably impossible, goals for myself I am on the road to disappointment. Nobody to blame but me, but that is not how I handle it. When reality sets in I blame everybody and everything else and, low and behold, frustration sets in and I become bitchy.
So it is almost time for lunch and I am still dealing with the breakfast dishes and the dryer just stopped, so I have to fold some clothes and the dog is sitting by the door with his “I have to pee” face on. Okay. Toss the clothes on top of the dryer, grab the leash and my coat, open the door and the phone rings. Down the drive I go with the dog pulling on the leash in one hand and the cell phone in the other, my coat blowing open in the breeze. I tell the caller I have no money for political campaigns, stuff the phone in my pocket and button up my coat. Talking to myself I say I need to just calm down. The walk is good for me and the dog can’t help it that he has to go. I can speed up when we get back. Instead of the labor intensive salad and soup I had in mind for lunch we will just have a quick grilled cheese then I will fold the clothes and leave the other load until tomorrow. I should be done with the bills in plenty of time to watch the game and bake the cookies my husband asked for after that. Got it!
I am close to home with the dog when I notice a car in my drive. It’s a friend delivering make up I ordered and we begin to chat. We get into the conversation, sit down and before I know it half an hour is gone. It is time for the game, so I fold the laundry, decide to pay the bills tomorrow. I open a bag of chips and get out some cold drinks. We can just have grilled cheese at dinner time. My husband reminds me that I promised cookies and my grandson wants to know if I have seen some paperwork he needs.
Another adjustment to make. I leave my boys (husband, grandson and friend, the dog) watching the game and go upstairs to locate the missing paperwork. I rummage through the freezer until I find a box of girl scout cookies then I return downstairs where I hand the grandson his papers and give my husband the cookies. Half time. So I go turn off the computer and empty the dishwasher. We finished off the chips and the cookies are still frozen so I fix a plate of cheese and crackers and go back to watch the rest of the game. My team lost.
It seems this day is a bust, so I give up. Everything else I was going to do can wait. I decide to give myself a break and I stretch out in my recliner with a book, hoping to relax an hour or so. A couple of paragraphs later my husband wants to know can I help him move a table. Sure I can. Then I notice that I tracked mud in when I brought my friend in the house so I sweep that up and go ahead and tidy up the mess from our game snacks. Then a phone call from my daughter and my grandson needs to know which shirt looks best and the sun is going down which means the dog will want food and his last walk of the day and my husband asks what I plan for dinner and I AM GOING TO SCREAM!
It’s really all about attitude, isn’t it. All of the things I have done today for all the people I did them for give me such pleasure. When I put them on a to do list I make chores out of joys. My family is my world. I couldn’t love them more than I do and taking care of them is what I enjoy most in life. What a shame that I took the joy of the day away from myself and grumbled and gripped that they were stealing it from me when they did no such thing. Chances are I will do the same thing again, but I hope not soon. I like me better when I am happily bustling about my home and just hanging out with the family. So for now my to do list is very short. Be happy.