via Daily Prompt: Fierce

Shakespeare comes to mind.  I believe the line from A Midsummer Night’s Dream is something like, ” and though she be but little she is fierce”.  I gave my granddaughter a charm with this quote to remind her of her soccer days.  For a small girl she sure played large. I miss going to her games, which we did from the time she was four until her last year of high school finished only a couple of months ago.  She is now beginning her adult phase and I hope she remains fierce through it all.

via Daily Prompt: Cheat

Earlier this evening I had some twenty somethings here for an impromptu supper.  This happens now and again when my grandson and some friends show up hungry and I happen to have fast fixins on hand.  They were talking about mutual acquaintances who split up because she cheated on him.  Hmmm.  What exactly does that mean in today’s world?  Apparently these young people were dating, which in itself is very different now from when I was young a long time ago.  Dating, if it includes several dates, probably includes sex, not just sharing a malt and seeing a movie.  So, cheating seems to consist of sex with someone else.  In my world it wouldn’t be cheating unless there was a committed relationship.  Dating may not actually be a committed relationship and if it is not then a date with someone else would not be cheating, it would just be a date.

Maybe it’s only cheating if you are sneaky about it.  Now that makes sense to me.  If a girl and a guy are spending time together frequently there may be an implied agreement that this is an exclusive arrangement.  I am not fond of implied situations.  I much prefer explicit definitions of what the relationship consists of and what behavior is expected and what is unacceptable.  So, youngsters, here’s what might save you some grief.  Say what you mean.  Say it early. Assume nothing.  If you are dating and you want to be with someone else be open and honest about that.  Chances are if you are interested in someone else the relationship you have isn’t a committed one.  This is one of those things better discovered sooner rather than later.

Of course there are many kinds of cheating.  It happens in sports and at school all the time. People cheat at work.  Tax cheats are common.  I wonder if I know anybody who never, not ever, had someone else do their homework or sneaked a peek at someone’s paper on a test.  Now I am not much into confessions but I can’t honestly say I never cheated in school.  I am sure that I didn’t cheat on taxes because the consequences could be a problem.

Is a cheater a bad person?  Maybe, maybe not.  And maybe just how awful one is because of cheating is a matter of degree.  Is it really horrible to round the number down a bit when asked about your weight?  Do we refuse to have a person in our life if they didn’t tell a cashier about making a mistake and giving back too much change?  I think we usually consider these to be minor, human failings and tend to overlook them.  Cheating that is also a betrayal is another matter.  I think my young friends have low regard for a cheater because of the betrayal, the lie.  If one of them tells the person they have been going out with that they are going out with someone else they would think that is unkind, but would not call it cheating.

via Daily Prompt: Obvious

My substitute word for obvious is “duh”. Not an especially mature or intelligent statement, but it does at times serve the purpose. For instance my husband might say that I made the dinner I wanted instead of what he would have preferred.  Well, duh.  Or when my dear, marvelous grandson asks if I want him to walk his dog.  Well, duh.

via Daily Prompt: Miniature

Miniature immediately brings to mind very small dogs for me.  I once knew a social worker who carried her tiny dog in her purse everywhere she went.  I believe there is an actress who does the same thing but I am not sufficiently impressed to remember who she is.  Several years ago there were ads in magazines for tiny dogs that fit into a tea cup.  Not my cup of tea.

 

via Daily Prompt: LearningDaily Prompt: Learning

Learning is living.  When one stops so does the other.  There is something to be learned in every day, often by accident.  I read a lot for entertainment, mostly fiction.  Even though my aim is only to amuse myself or maybe escape to a fantasy world for a bit I learn about cultures, eras and places as I follow the plot. Historical novels let me feel as if I were there better than a history text book might.  I think learning is better and the knowledge acquired has more staying power if the process is pleasurable.

via Daily Prompt: Fifty

For several days I have been looking at these daily prompts and promising myself I would write something, even if only a sentence for each one.  But then my computer died and then the basement flooded and then the dog needed his nails clipped and my husband wanted company watching the Olympics and stuff just kept happening  and I am just now writing after planning for days to do so.  I am going to have to figure out what I will do about that.  Sometime.  Soon.

Fifty immediately becomes an age for me.  I remember fifty.  I thought I was getting old when I had lived for fifty years, but here I am twenty years later and I don’t feel old at all.  My feet feel old, but I don’t.

Fifty dollars is not much money but fifty million dollars is a life altering sum. A fifty / fifty chance of rain doesn’t tell me much about what to expect weather wise.  Fifty or more employees can subject a business to more regulations than fewer than fifty.  I wonder what the process was to arrive at fifty instead of say, forty-eight.

I think I can do this!  I would not have thought about fifty at all without the prompt but there are really many things to be said about it.  Now I wonder what tomorrow’s word will be.

According to a local news report a movie theatre had to be evacuated yesterday because of an altercation involving a man with a gun.  It was reported like this.  A child was kicking the chair of the man in front of him.  This man turned around and cussed out the kid.  The kid’s father proceeded to chew out that man who then pulled a gun, all alledgedly of course.

In my view here’s what should have happened.  A child old enough to be taken to the movies should already know better than to kick the seat in front of him, so that should not have happened.  If the child has not already been taught to be considerate of the others in the theatre his father should immediately direct him to stop and he should politely apologize to the man whose seat was being kicked.  The adult who overreacted by swearing at the child should have turned around and politely asked the child to please not kick the seat anymore.  The father, instead of making matters worse, should have calmly asked the man to use less offensive language and apologized for his son’s behavior.  The other guy should not have pulled out his gun.  He should have either sat down and shut up or moved to another seat.

But oh, no.  These two “adults” had to prove to each other that they are tough and can’t be pushed around. Great example there ass wipes.  I hope that the dad has realized that his  child needs to be taught some manners.  That could be a challenge if he himself has none.  I don’t know whether or not that is the case.

Now, the guy with the gun that he apparently needed to defend himself from little kid feet ought to never be allowed anywhere near a weapon again.  He is just too stupid.

It seems to me that responsibility is in short supply in our society.  The choices each of us makes affect others.  Our actions often have unintended consequences.  A peace office makes a poor choice causing injury or death to someone who appears to have been innocent and riots break out in protest.  An unintended consequence.  In a misguided attempt at vengeance someone shoots a cop who had nothing to do with the first issue.  An unintended consequence.

Even greater irresponsibility is demonstrated by those who just don’t care how others may suffer as long as they get to do what they want.  From the school  yard bully to the polluting factories selfishness and greed ignore the damage done.

I have seen this lack of responsibility everywhere.  On the lake where boaters run full speed and the wake behind them swamps other boats.  On the highway where fools texting cross the center line and endanger oncoming traffic.  Wild fires burn forests and homes because campers failed to put out their fire.  Buildings collapse due to shoddy workmanship. On and on and on.

Like other problems this will not get better unless we hold ourselves and others accountable for what we do.  Parents who fail to teach responsibility to their children set the rest of us up for trouble and the children for failure.  Teachers, elected officials and police all have an obligation to set an example of appropriate behavior.  Neighbors and strangers have an obligation to be civil toward one another.

And for crying out loud, grown men ought to have the maturity to deal with a kid kicking a seat  without needing a deadly weapon.

 

There is a lot of talk going around about taking things back.  Take our country back.  Get back to values.  Go back home. Get back to better times.  It all seems so silly to me.  Most things seem silly to me lately.

The people talking about taking their country back annoy me the most.  In the first place who says it is, or was, theirs?  Maybe it’s mine, our yours, or I get it, ours.  All of us.  Well actually this land was occupied long before the wing nuts who are making noise about taking it back were an itch in their daddy’s britches.

Here’s another thought about that.  Back to what exactly?  What I am hearing is wishful thinking for an imaginary  time and place where the people were pretty much alike.  I think they long for a nation of Mayberry RFD style towns where all the people are white, go to the same church and always say please and thank you. What the gobackers want Is not real and never was.

I lived in that place they think they want to go back to and it was not great.  The small town school offered us a limited education at best.  No music or art. We had two kinds of people; white and colored and the two were expected to stay in their place.  We were taught to be nice to the colored kids at school but don’t bring them home. There were probably homosexuals but they certainly were not acknowledged.  I remember five churches none of which were Catholic.  I was twenty years old before I met a Jewish person and did not even know Islam existed until I was out of high school.  It was a place that left one feeling ignorant and small.  It was dangerous on a somewhat smaller scale from more sophisticated cities just because of the smaller number of people there.  I witnessed a robbery and murder on the street outside my house before I was twelve.  I knew kids at school who were abused at home on a regular basis.  There was a preacher who had an affair with his neighbor and more than our fair share of drunks.

Count me out of going back to a fantasy better time.  I had rather go forward.  The future interests me more than the past and I prefer improving to regressing.

 

 

It’s been a strange few days.  Some pretty rough storms early last week canceled our plans for the 4th holiday so that we stayed home and watched east coast fireworks on television and then tried to get some sleep between the neighbors blasting fireworks.  Okay, only once a year so we can deal with it.  More storms the next day knocked out the electricity from mid afternoon until about nine thirty the following morning.  It was a long hot night without the air conditioning. Great timing from the electric company restored power about half an hour after we got the generator going and plugged in to the necessities (fridge and television).

With creature comforts restored we could catch up on the news.  What a shame that the only way to stop hearing the same old politics on all channels is for tragedy to strike.  And strike it did.  First two black men killed by police then the horror in Dallas.  It seems to me that I have had this what the hell is wrong with people feeling over and over.  I just don’t know how to process this shock and disgust anymore. Everywhere; neighbors at the grocery, all over social media, on the news and in the papers, blame is assigned.  It’s guns.  It’s racism.  We made god mad. It’s payback for some dumb thing in the past.  Baloney.  I say baloney because I am trying not to say bull shit so much.

The questions I ask myself when these events occur are probably the same as most others ask.  What can we do?  More particularly, what can I do?  I feel certain that racists and bullies should not be police officers, but can I do anything about that?  I could approach the sheriff and chief of police where I live and state my concerns.  Whether or not that would have any effect depends on how it’s received and whether these individuals are genuinely concerned about this issue.  I could write letters to elected officials but it has been my past experience that these are not acknowledged or are only acknowledged with a condescending form letter.  Maybe I will try anyway.  I am equally certain that dangerous or disturbed individuals should not have access to deadly weapons.  It is painfully clear that doing anything about that is not possible in the USA.

That leaves me with what can I really do?  All I can come up with is do whatever you can wherever you are.  When you are among people try greeting them instead of ignoring them.  Say thank you to the man who carries out your groceries and to the stranger who opened  a door for you. If you see someone drop something pick it up and give it to them.  Put someone’s need ahead of your desire.  If someone new moves into your neighborhood go say hello and welcome them.  The world may not get better from one person’s kindness and consideration of others, but that person’s world will feel better.

Yesterday I made up my mind to find a way to show some kindness to a stranger.  Not as easy as you might think since I mostly stay at home.  I did however need to get groceries so I made myself concentrate on the people I came in contact with and to smile or speak instead of keeping my eye on the shelves and minding my own business to an unnecessary degree.  Most folks smiled back and I got to checkout feeling more relaxed than usual.  The person bagging my stuff was not very fast and not all that skilled, but I thanked her anyway as she seemed to be doing her best.  There was an elderly lady, even older than me, loading bags into her trunk so I stopped long enough to help her out.  She wasn’t all that grateful, but her gratitude was not my goal in the first place so I am glad I made her chore a little easier.

All those things I think I can manage to continue to do regularly, for the purely selfish reason that I feel better when I am nice to people.  A good opportunity presented itself as I pulled into the driveway of my house and spotted a man cleaning up the neighbors yard.  This neighbor is not able to do much and with all the rain we have had his lawn and all the bushes around his house were a huge mess.  The day was very hot and I noticed the man doing the work was sweaty with a rag tied around his head to protect from the sun.  He stopped to lean on the shovel he was using, waived and said “How you doin?”  As soon as I  had put things away I poured some lemonade into a to go cup and walked over to offer that to him.  He put his hand out and introduced himself as Lional and asked my name.  We had a short visit.  He wished me a good day and I wished him the same.

This is not a life changing event for either of us. But maybe I will not be reluctant to approach another stranger to offer some kindness just because he is black.  And maybe Lionel will consider it more likely that a white person respects him because one woman did. For now this is the best I can do.